Pantheism

I have always sensed that organized religion was the wrong approach to God. I have discovered there is no religion, or non-religion (Buddhism, Atheism, Science), that is accurate in its entirety. We simply do not have, nor are we meant to have, the puzzle pieces to answer this test-of-time inquiry. It’s a mystery to be experienced and not understood. Though I explored many: Baptized and Confirmed Catholic, “Saved” with the Baptists, years of Agnostic Code in college and then Baptized again with a non-denominational Christian Church.

I began to find myself envious of those I consider brainwashed and simple. I began to pray that I could just simply accept what was in the Bible and stick with a beautiful Sunday worship. I begged for something to fit me into a belief puzzle, so I could worship with like-minded folk. I begged to understand enough to accept doctrine, in a way that would bring me calm, faith, compassion, love, forgiveness, humility and ultimately, purpose and happiness. I wanted to believe something true.

And all too often,
I get what I ask for—

It took Alcoholism, and the program of recovery, to bring me to the obvious answer—
My God Can Simply Be My “Higher Power”
and I can leave it at that and not be damned to hell, punished or wrong.
I absolutely hate to be wrong.

So for today, and for many days before this one,
I chose to call my God:
The Universe
and sometimes:
Higher Power
and others it’s simply:
God

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